Zen and the Art of Dealing with Difficult People

In part 1 we'll explore what a troublesome buddha is and what it means to start learning from the difficult people in our lives. Then in part 2 we'll explore how our particular tendencies and habitual behaviours contribute to the difficulty of certain relationships - for example one person might get angry, while another person may react very apologetically. In part 3, I introduce what I'd see as the first key skill to develop - awareness of body sensations and the importance of maintaining emotional regulation, and in part 4 I guide a body scan meditation practice. Part 5 is about the second key skill: considering the possibility that you may not always be in the right. In part 6 I guide a meditation on being with discomfort in the body, since our ability to be ok with discomfort as the emotional heat rises is very important. Part 7 is all about trying out new ways of behaving, and I guide a meditation on a Zen koan about dealing with conflict in part 8. Part 9 is about the subject of  opinions, how they can contribute to the difficulty in our relationships and how we can learn to hold them more lightly. And in part 10, we explore shifting from a perspective of seeing ourselves and others as separate to one of connection and integration, where we might see everyone (including our difficult people) as just facets in one giant jewel.

Each part includes a suggestion for an exercise or set of exercises to follow to help you embody the teachings of this course.